Days, weeks, months, and years after cremation services in Oakwood, OH, people are surprised to find that math is involved with the deaths of and grief for their loved ones who have died.
A lot of children complain about math from its simplest forms all the way through its complicated forms (algebra and calculus) and wonder why they have to take math because they don’t think they’ll ever really use it. That, in fact, may have been your experience with math when you were in school.
But the reality is that we use math every day (even those complicated forms) and we don’t even realize it. If you’re halving or doubling a recipe, you use concepts from algebra. If you’re shooting pool with a friend, you use geometry and physics to calculate your shots.
But you also use math in grief equations. That may be an odd term that you’ve never heard before, but you’ll certainly recognize what they look like.
One of the grief equations that you use in determining how old your loved one who is died would be now. You can do this two ways. You can take the year of their birth and subtract it from the current year or you can take their age when they died and add the number of years between the year they died in the current year.
Another one of the grief equations that you may use is wondering how many years it will be until you’re the same age as your loved one when they died. In this case, you simply subtract your age now from the age they were when they died.
Another grief equation that is common is to ask how many holidays your loved one has missed. Whether it’s Christmas or Thanksgiving, you subtract the year of their death from the current year to get the answer.
Have you ever wondered how many grandchildren or nieces and nephews your loved one didn’t get to meet? That is a grief equation.
Grief equations can also make us consider our own mortality. If, for instance, you had a parent who died at a younger age, you may feel some trepidation as your own age inches close to the age they were when they died. You may wonder if you’ll die at a younger age as they did. You may worry that the clock might be running out on your own life.
Grief math is something that every bereaved person does. It begins the day your loved one dies. You count the first week, perhaps looking at the clock at the exact time your loved one died.
You count the first month since they’ve died, then the first six months since they’ve died, and then the first year since they’ve died. The time, however, passing by doesn’t always put distance between you and your grief over the loss of your loved one.
Some days are better, some weeks are better, some months are better, and some years are better, but there will always be reminders of how much time has passed since your loved one died.
It’s not unusual to think about what it would be like for your loved one if they were alive now and could see everything that was happening personally in your life and in the larger context of the world. Sometimes, when you do this, you come to the realization that while they might be delighted to experience the personal things in your life, the bigger world would be one they wouldn’t recognize.